And so it has begun...

New Years Eve with my GOHS teammates

My first track season here at La Verne is officially under way and I am not entirely sure how to feel about it. As I ran my first run of 2011 with a few of my old Great Oak teammates, we discussed some of our resolutions for the new year. While I haven't quite established a concrete list of my New Years' goals and aspirations, I know that one thing is certain; if I am going to have a successful track season, I have to change my attitude.

I have been incredibly bitter about the upcoming season because I don't know what to expect. I thought that I had cross country season all figured out and then was forced to deal with the harsh reality of disappointment and the inexplicable feelings of failure that resulted. I strive for perfection, almost demand it at times. The possibilities of the unknown terrify me.

As a freshman in high school, I loved track season. I felt like I had something to be proud of and I was happy. I don't know exactly when or why it changed, but I am no longer the fearless freshman I once was. Ever since the year I was forced to take off, I have felt incapable. The possibility of ever running the times I once did seem incomprehensible and far-fetched.

I am sick of the negative nancy that I become as soon as track season rolls around. So as the girls and I were discussing possible New Years' resolutions, the idea of changing my attitude seemed very appropriate. Considering that I am a psychology major, I should realize that I have been setting myself up for failure, engaging in the self-fulfilling prophecy, due to my bitter attitude regarding track season. I am over it. Done. My negative attitude has to come to an end. It will definitely be a challenging resolution, but I have never been one to back down from a challenge. :)

I will keep you all posted.

Goodbye cross country hello track

All-Conference Team at Championships/9th place

Team huddle before SCIAC Championships

So, as it was pointed out to me recently, I haven't made a new blog post in quite some time. I would say that I am definitely way past overdue for an update. The end of my cross country season wasn't nearly how I expected it to be, and I wish I could rewind about a month ago, run a few races over again, and end the season on a high note. Unfortunately, I have to learn from the mistakes I made and look forward to making it to Nationals next season.

I was very disappointed in my performance at Regionals and it felt like a repeat of my freshman year in Florida. In Florida, I ran a strong race at Conference and then completely fell apart at Regionals. While I didn't have the worst race of my life this season at Regionals in Oregon, it definitely wasn't the race I knew I was capable of. I wanted to make Nationals more than anything this season and it would have been pretty cool to have been racing in Iowa for Nationals on my 20th birthday this year. The fact of the matter is that it didn't happen and I need to use it as motivation for next year. Whether it be next season or my senior year, I WILL make Nationals.

Although I didn't make it to Nationals this season, I couldn't have been more proud of my teammate Aj for making it. He was more than deserving of his Nationals spot and while it may not have been the race he was hoping for, he did a great job of representing La Verne in Iowa! All in all, it was a frustrating way to end my season. However, it was a good season of experience and I really feel that I will be ready next season to test my limits. :)

PS. I just wanted to give a little shout-out to all of the GOHS kids. I want you all to know how proud I am of you for an amazing season and girls, I can't believe you WON the state meet! This is the moment I know we have been working towards for a long time and it has finally happened. You all did such an amazing job of representing Temecula at Nike Cross Nationals and I wish I could have been a part of it all. To the guys, I am so happy that you finally made it as a team to the State Meet. It is a huge accomplishment and I hope you all recognize how big of a deal it was! Love you all very much! Xoxo

"Fall seven times, stand up eight."

-Japanese Proverb

Time for an Update

Game face! Start of the race

Hey fellow bloggers and readers! First of all, I want to say sorry for the negligence on my behalf to post as often as I should be. I have been extremely busy between training, racing, essays, and exams! I promise to post more often, even if it is just a small post here and there.

I didn't update everyone on my race at the Pomona Pitzer Invitational on October 2nd so I will recap. I placed 26th individually out of 171 girls and as a team, we got 9th place out of 12 teams. I ran a 23:29 and was satisfied with my performance because it is my season pr thus far. From the minute I woke up that day, I knew that I felt great and was ready to run fast. I felt strong and definitely feel like I am ready to challenge myself to go sub 23 in the next couple of races. The most challenging part of the race was the first mile because it narrowed quickly and with so many girls, it turned nasty with girls trying to push and shove to get a good position. I got boxed in for the first mile so it was a little slower than I would have liked, but I made up ground during the middle miles. I was disappointed by my finish, as I got passed up within the last few seconds by at least 3 girls. I know that I need to work on my final kick and since the race, I have really been focusing on keeping a positive attitude during our speed workouts and strides. Overall, I was satisfied, although I know that I still have a lot of work to do before the end of the season.

We have our first SCIAC Multi-Dual this weekend which I am looking forward to because it gives me the opportunity to see how I stack up against other runners in my conferences, in addition to giving the team a good look at where we are currently and where we want to be by the end of the season. I am hesitant going into the race though because I have been a medical disaster these past couple of weeks. I set a new personal record last week and made it to urgent care twice for different reasons. My first visit was last Wednesday for a smashed thumb. On Tuesday night, my teammate Michael and I were making a trip to Target when I slammed my thumb completely in his car door. I thought my thumb was broken because it was throbbing all Tuesday night, which resulted in my 1 hour of sleep which I can tell you is not fun to run off of the next morning! My mom took me to urgent care the next day and luckily, it is not broken, just badly bruised. The second trip to urgent care was last Friday due to abdominal issues and pain in my left side. I had to have an ultrasound and blood tests done over the weekend and will get a few more tests done this Friday, although they think part of my pain might be a kidney or bladder infection. I hope that I can tough out the pain this weekend; I might not run a pr this weekend but I can guarantee that I will give it everything I have!

Thank you all for being patient with me! I promise to blog more often.

Asics/UC Irvine XC Invitational

The start of the girls 5k race

Coach Jason giving the girls high fives after the race

This past weekend we had our 2nd race at UC Irvine. Being that it was our only 5k of the season, I felt tremendous pressure to run a fast time. I am not sure entirely why I was so worried at the thought of a 5k instead of a 6k, but mentally it was tough to fathom the idea that the race would be shorter and I wondered if I would able to build off of the successful race the week prior.

I did feel like I had an advantage going into the race because we had already run the course a couple times as a workout during cross country camp in Newport Beach a few weeks ago. I knew what the hills felt like, knew where I would have to be mentally tough in the race, and already had a plan of when I was going to start my final kick. The course started on a grass field and after 2 laps around the perimeter, the course narrowed immensely. I knew that I had to get out quickly and get a position if I wanted to run a fast time.

I finished the race in 23rd place at 19:12 and in all honesty, I was initially disappointed when I heard my time. I had expected more out of myself and although I had given the race everything I had, I was hoping to run at least sub 19. As my teammates finished, I tried to shove the negativity aside and focus on my team. After the post race talk with Coach, I knew that I had no reason to be upset. We had accomplished the goals we had set for the race and exceeded everyone's expectations.

I waited for a few days after the race to blog about it because I needed time to think it over. As I recapped my freshman cross country season in Florida, I realized that the time I ran this past weekend was better than any race I had last year. My race splits were consistent and I even finished my last mile in a strong 5:42! I am starting where I ended my season last year. This is only the start of a long season; I have plenty of time to improve and run faster times. I can only be grateful that I have been blessed with an amazingly supportive team and coaches that care about me. While I didn't run the time I was hoping for this weekend, I am happy with my performance overall. As a team, we established that we are here to compete and I cannot wait until our next race in a couple of weeks!

Fullerton Opener

"Big occasions and races which have been eagerly anticipated almost to the point of dread, are where great deeds can be accomplished."

-Jack Lovelock

Today was the big day; the start of cross country season and the chance for all of the hard work I put in over summer to pay off. The Fullerton Opener this morning was our first cross country meet of the season and I can honestly say that I walk away from my race happy and excited for the races to come.

I have been anxiously awaiting my first race with my new team all summer and as I woke up this morning, I was terrified. I was so nervous that I barely ate or drank anything. I was terrified of failure. I knew that I was ready but I started to doubt myself. On top of the pressure I was feeling as we headed to the meet, the boys van ran out of gas and they were forced to push the van to the nearest gas station. I was still having second thoughts during our warm up, but I knew that I needed to forget about all of the negativity and race for my teammates.

It is amazing how my friends and family are able to inspire me on a daily basis; whether it be kind words, a hug, or simply their presence; I am so thankful to have people that support me no matter what. After our warm-up jog, I ran into a couple old high school teammates and the nerves instantly went away. With my friends and family by my side, I knew that I was ready to race.

I didn't get out fast enough the first 100 meters and was boxed in for about 3/4 of a mile. Regardless, I came through the mile at around 6:10 and was feeling pretty strong. As soon as I had a little room, I maneuvered my way up to the top third of the race and gradually tried to pick it up. At about the 2 mile marker, I noticed a girl from UCLA in front of me and decided to make a move. As I passed her, I glanced over my shoulder and realized that it was Taryn Pastoor from Murrieta Valley High School. Taryn is a junior at UCLA and ever since my freshman year of high school at Great Oak, we have been competitive with each other. Ever since I took my sophomore year off from running, I haven't been able to compete at the same level. It was like I was flashing back to my freshman year in the 2 mile racing her at Rancho Verde. As silly as it seems that I was so ecstatic about passing Taryn Pastoor today; I felt the confidence today that I haven't felt since I was a freshman and that was exciting.

I ended up finishing the 6k at 23:53 in 35th place out of about 220 runners. It was an extremely slow course consisting of thick grass and thick sand for most of the race. I ended up beating Taryn Pastoor and wasn't too far off of Anne Randall from Long Beach State (Anne Randall ran for Saugus High School and went sub 5 in the mile). I felt the happiest I have after a race in a long time. I knew that I gave everything I had and left it all on the course. It was a great first race and I am looking forward to the UC Irvine Invitational next weekend. Until then, I am going to enjoy my weekend at home and continue to train hard!

Micaela, Sydney, and I at Olive Garden for the pre-race team dinner

The girls after the race!

Settling in the dorm

First of all, I am sorry that I haven't updated my blog in a while. I have been extremely busy since moving in last Thursday; trying to get the Internet working and being away at Newport Beach for cross country camp has kept me occupied. I am preparing for my first class as I write this post. I have had a crazy week, but it has definitely been worth it and I can't believe I am getting ready for my first class of sophomore year.

I moved into my new dorm last Wednesday and it was chaotic to say the least. My mom and I left the house early Wednesday morning and made it up to La Verne in just over an hour. It took me a few hours to figure out my housing situation, but I was able to sort it out and move everything in. We had cross country meetings all day so I hurried to get all my stuff in the room before meeting up with the team. The first night was challenging and pretty lonely, but I already felt more at home than I did in Florida and knew things would get better once everyone started moving in.

The beginning of my very pink dorm room :)

Our much anticipated time trial was Thursday morning and we were up bright and early. I was exhausted and it was hard staying positive, but I knew that I was beyond capable of running a fast 2 miles. The team did a 2 mile warm up together and as were were doing drills, I thought of all the hard work I had put in over the summer. I was ready.

The first mile hurt and my legs felt heavy but I knew that once I got used to the feeling of racing again, I would feel better. The second mile felt great and I was really able to open my stride and relax, despite running a faster pace than I did for the first mile. My teammate Micaela was right behind me for the first mile and as we got to the mile marker, I broke away and picked up the pace. I finished first for the girls team, running 12:33 after making a couple wrong turns. I wasn't completely satisfied with my time, but I think that it was more of an effort course and I felt that I had given it everything I could have. The last 300 meters of the race, I felt the speed training I had done this summer pay off. I felt that I had a little something left in the tank and was able to pick up the pace significantly.

Although I really had hoped to run a faster time, I was able to relax knowing the time trial was over and done with. We left for Newport Beach Thursday afternoon and I was excited to spend a few days with teammates before classes began. It was fun getting to know everyone and running with my teammates and staying in beach houses. I love my new teammates and coaches. Coach Mike and our assistant Coach Jason really put a lot of time and effort in trying to make Camp Runamok a success. I didn't want to leave the beach!

After all the fun and excitement of Camp Runamok and getting situated in the dorms, I am sitting here now trying to get ready for my first day of classes. I can't wait to meet all of my professors and to learn again after a much needed relaxing summer! I will post again soon bloggers! To the Great Oak kiddos, I wish you all the best of luck in your training as you prepare for the upcoming races and fun events ahead! Stay focused and realize that all of your hard work will pay off very soon. :)

I absolutely love my new teammates!

From left to right: Shelby, Micaela, me, Sydney, and Brigitte

No Expectations

I know what I am capable of. This is going to be a good cross country season and everything will play out the way it is supposed to. With our 2 mile time trial just around the corner, I have been trying to prepare myself mentally and physically. After a challenging cross country season in Florida, I don't really know what to expect. Although the uncertainty has been driving me crazy, I am not going into the time trial on Thursday with a plan; the only expectation that I have for myself is to have fun and run for my teammates.

One of the reasons why I believe I was so successful my freshman year of high school was because I had no idea what I was doing; I ran because it made me happy. I want to have my freshman mentality going into the time trial. If I don't set my bar of expectations too high, then I will have no reason to be disappointed. I almost have to prepare myself for the worst knowing that while I am beyond capable of running a fast time and surprising myself, running isn't always a perfect sport.

This is only the beginning; the start of many workouts and races to come. I am going into this time trial with confidence in my training and the satisfaction of knowing I have put in the hard work; the rest will come together if I continue to work hard and push myself. Here's to a great season with my La Verne team! :)